Introverted or just isolated?

Introverts like to discover themselves and travel inward. Being alone gives them time to think and do all kinds of things without having to worry about the reactions and needs of others. This is how they recharge. Introverts are genuine and know what they want most of the time. They don’t miss friends; they simply like to spend more time alone than with other people. Isolation, on the other hand, is about escape and avoidance. Isolation leaves us numb, exhausted and feeling miserable.

Anyone can isolate themselves, this is not specific to introverts, but it can be harder for an introvert to tell the difference if they have a period of isolation or if they just need time to themselves.

We need to talk about these aspects with the arrival of fall with cold mornings, dark evenings and much less sun. More and more of us tend to cancel plans, avoid commitments or people, to spend more and more time locked in the house. It doesn’t necessarily have to be a bad thing, as long as we still feel positive, confident, have desires, plans and people in our lives.

When the person isolates himself, it is probably due to depressive moods or anxiety states. Many times people prefer to isolate themselves because a certain behavior is uncomfortable for them, they are tired of pretending that they are “ok” or they feel under social pressure that they don’t know how to manage otherwise. Isolation is than seen as a solution, a way to avoid the stress of life.

Whether you’re an introvert or just having a period where isolation seems like the solution, the steps below might help you feel better.

· Understand the cause – Why are you isolating yourself? Are you depressed, lonely, socially awkward? It’s an difficult question, but it’s important to be honest with yourself. Talk to a person who does not judge how easy or difficult it is for you to interact with others at the moment. It’s OK to ask for help, be it professional. It’s just as OK to find that you just need to be alone and recharge.

· Keep in touch with someone you know – Even if you feel like avoiding people for a while, call a friend, a dear family member, just to hear the voice of someone other than your thoughts.

· Take small steps – Go out for coffee with a friend for an hour. You go to places where you feel safe and give you emotional comfort. Visit your family (if it helps you, don’t do it if it doesn’t bring you positive feelings!). Don’t force yourself into long interactions, take small steps, things will build over time.

· Remember that you are not the “dessert of the day” – You can’t please everyone, and you don’t have to! Many isolate themselves because they are tired of feeling uncomfortable or because they feel they make others uncomfortable. It is not a solution. It’s better to start saying NO more often to those who you feel are taking advantage of you. Speak up, share your opinion when you have one, maybe it won’t increase your popularity, but it will definitely help you feel yourself around people, if they are the right ones they will understand. Develop authentic relationships.

Are you an introvert or someone who tends to isolate themselves?